Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Circus Tricks

I haven't watched a Mets game in some time, nor have I even caught a glimpse of one in close to a month. This is what happens when your team bottoms out and runs a minor league line up out every fucking night. But check this reversal of fortune. Last time I saw a glimpse of a game, I stopped outside of a bar in Williamsburg to look in and get a score. Instead, I saw the Dodgers stepping out of the dugout and congratulating each other before the SNY graphic with the score popped up. Dodgers 11, Mets 2. Fucking yikes. Tonight, as I rode down Atlantic Avenue after work, I looked into the local watering hole to see the Mets congratulating each other on the infield. "Son of a bitch," I muttered to myself as I rode, "they won again."

Of course, that doesn't change the fact that the circus is still in town. But fuck it, as long as the circus is still here, why not go all out and add some death defying feats? THRILL to Mike Pelfrey putting 10 MEN on base in 6.1 innings and still somehow giving up NO RUNS! COVER YOUR EYES as he loads the bases in TWO different innings! STARE IN AMAZEMENT as Jeff Francoeur sees SEVEN pitches in three at bats and still somehow manages a base knock and an RBI! ASKK YOURSELF SERIOUSLY if a team with playoff aspirations should go TWO MONTHS before winning four straight games again! WONDER ALOUD how Sean Green pitches a scoreless inning!

OK, so maybe that last one is a cheap shot what with Bad For The Irish's turnaround since his April troubles, but I'll be damned if I'm going to let that go so fast. If it takes Luis Castillo having the third highest OBP among all the second basemen in baseball to get Met fans to accept him, Sean Green's going to have to cease giving up runs from here until the end of the season, whenever that is. WHOOPS still don't believe there'll be a game 163! The Mets still owe me a game and half in the standings before I start doing desperate things like going and getting drunk down the block and watching them on their lunch break, or even going to a game with a couple of Cardinals fans next week.

So before we get all jacked up on hope and start screaming to the world about the Mets being back and this blog getting two new sets of eyeballs in Yitzie(sp?) and Brian (shout out accomplished), let's look at two ugly facts, sponsored by the Ugly Truth, starring Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler. Hah hah hah, sellout. Even if the Mets sweep the Rockies in this series, they still need to climb over the marginal contenders: the Brewers, Astros (sorry Tex), Marlins and Braves. Then they need to climb over the Cardinals, Rockies, Giants and Cubs, and two of those teams are good enough to have been picked to win the NL Central. Second, the Mets are still three games under .500. Fucking yikes.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Good Things Come To Those Who Wait (A Really Really Long Time)

It's been a really, really long time since anything good has happened to the Mets. You can tell not by looking at the standings or watching a press conference, but by listening to Howie Rose call Fernando Tatis' game winning grand slam. He sounded surprised about everything: the ball going back, the ball clearing the 125 foot wall, Fernando Tatis being the guy who hit it out, the home run kind of maybe counting in a grander sense than just scoring runs. Not that Howie was the only guy that was surprised considering I was zoning out playing video games and only half listening to the maddeningly unlistenable Wayne Hagin. Shit, I was one more DP away from renaming Fernando Tatis "Fernandoubleplay Tatis." No it doesn't roll off the tongue, but either do most of my sputtering curses as he kills another rally.

Of course, if you want to get technical and don't want to bother listening to a confused Howie Rose, you can look at the Mets' schedule and note this is the team's first three game winning streak since May and that Jim Tracy apparently thought so little of this game that he brought in a pitcher with a 6.00 ERA and a 1.59 WHIP and sat and watched him walk the first two hitters he faced before deciding drastic action needed to be taken. You can wonder what the hell is going on in the front office and why all of a sudden the usually media savvy Omar Minaya declared open war on Adam Rubin at a press conference designed to sweep bad feelings away from the team.

Shit, look at the box score too and note that Jeff Francoeur saw 8 pitches in the three at bats he had before being intentionally walked and that his intentional walk was his first as a Met. Or take note that Oliver Perez walked four batters in five innings. Actually, that one could be construed as a positive, since it means he pitched more innings than the number of men he walked, a feat he's accomplished less than half the time he's started this year.

Oh right, they won tonight.

Fuck, what do you want from me? Matt Cerrone was watching with playoff intensity and Greg Prince isn't sure what to make of all this. At this juncture in the season, Tatis' grand slam has a better shot of turning out like Ramon Castro's home run against the Phillies in early September 2005: the last roar of an underachieving team up to its neck in water. I don't want to be a downer, but wake me up when the Mets are four games back and they don't have a AAA line-up and Johan Santana isn't giving up career highs in everything bad. I'll still listen because I'm an idiot and because I'll miss baseball when it's over, but I'll be damned if I'll believe.

Unless of course, I wake up and they're four games back.