Tuesday, June 12, 2007

The News Gets Worse

Despair Tex, despair more than normal, because I'm here to report that local politics are just as dumb, if not dumber than our little imbroglio in DC (I spelled "imbroglio" on the first try. Hooray for me.) First children, I will explain how things work in government when one sends a letter.

See, in the real world, when one sends a letter asking for information, the receiver of the letter looks over it and answers it, even if the answer is "Speak to my lawyer." Having been involved in two mass mailings here at work, I can tell you this does not happen when the government is involved. First, you mail the letter. Then you wait a week for middling response from perhaps one percent of the targets. Then? Then you call. And call. And talk to people who magically never received your letter, be they business owners or school principals. The calling will take you at least a week, during which you will say the same line over and over again, desperately hoping the phones will lose service and release you from the torture.

And don't even expect people in government to give you even a cursory call back, even if their title is "Director of Intergovernmental Affairs", a job which merely entails keeping people like me happy. No, the telephone and the letter are two pieces of technology that government has yet to understand.

But how about something truly visionary? Surely elected officials have an eye on the future and want to hear new and exciting ideas regarding said timeline. Nope, wrong again. I had the unfortunate opportunity to watch the public hearing in the New York State Assembly regarding Mayor Bloomberg's congestion pricing. And I gotta say, I was horrified.

Congestion pricing may not end up being the fix all for city traffic, but damn if it isn't at least a good revenue raiser for a frequently cash strapped city. And here were old men with no future short of Country Kitchen Buffet grasping at straws, feigning concern for places they've barely heard of, just to block a plan that could make real change.

These are two of the many reasons that by next March, my grand plan is to take up the trade of bike messenger and live in squalor in Bed-Stuy. I'll probably get robbed, but I least I won't feel slimy. There is some good news however: Lindsay Lohan is the coke fueled suicidal bi-sexual we always hoped she would turn into.

1 comment:

Little Blue PD said...

We all have to wonder what Bloomberg is really thinking of with this congestion pricing tax scheme. Maybe he mostly just wants a new tax. Just wrap it up in ‘concern for the environment’, and then people can just demonize those who oppose it.

If he cares so much about traffic jams, congestion and air pollution, why does he let Park Avenue be blocked off? Why doesn’t he do anything about that?

It's true, Pershing Square Restaurant blocks Park Avenue going South at 42nd St. for about 12 hours a day/5 months of the year! This Causes Massive Congestion & Air Pollution!

But apparently it does not bother NYC’s Nanny-in-Chief Mike “Congestion Pricing Tax” Bloomberg? Check out the map!


Check it out!


Little Blue PD